Think Tree !

We see that the Jewish calendar is rather divinely inspired and in perfect harmony with the school year, even when we are out of school we still end up pacing our years in the same method.

We needed to start anew and afresh with the Yamim Noraaim - and have Hashem wipe the slate clean in order to be ready for the year. After all that praying and cleansing we felt so pure that we could just dive into a mitzva with our whole bodies ! (We sit in the Succah with our entire bodies ! The Lulav & Esrog represent our main limbs ) The long, dark winter set in - we felt estranged from hashem ( chas ve'shalom ! ) so we received a gift of light ! to carry us through.

With most of the winter gone, and our roots strengthening in the soil of Torah - our 'sap' is starting to finally rise within us and we can now begin to think about bearing fruits. As we know - fruits aren't the product of intense concentration on the part of a tree - the tree just focuses on growing and absorbing and assimilating nutrients into itself. The fruit is the byproduct of this focus. It's what happens when the tree builds up it's goodness to the bursting point. If we approach our own growth in order to 'see what we've gained' then we are missing the point. For example - if we want to be the kind of person who loses herself in the sweet words of Tehillim for a half hour every day - taking out a stopwatch is the wrong way to go about it !! If I am concerned that my chessed resume isn't so impressive - going out to do something for someone else - so I can really do it for myself - is missing the boat completely !

It's our job to concentrate on soaking up the 'nutrients' of Torah - the 'fruits' - our maasim tovim - will proceed on their own as a natural outcropping of this. So as we celebrate the renewal of trees and the approach of springtime - remember - "Think Tree !"

Are you Happy ?

My Rosh Yeshiva, Shlita, always used to ask me
- "Yoyav, are you happy ?!"

I believe the purpose of his question was not just to make sure things were going okay with me.
I think it stemmed from a unique perspective on the dictum of Chazal, "Ivdu Es Hashem BeSimcha"

One can understand it to mean - serve Hashem while being happy, 'besimcha' with happiness - while you perform your mitzvos and other services for Him.

However, the meaning projected here - is 'serve Hashem with your happiness' ! The happiness isn't a condition or mindframe while serving Hashem - it IS the service itself !

Why do some things make some people happy and others do not ? The answer is that Hashem created us uniquely, each one with a sense of what will make us happy. When we are happy we are in fact fulfilling our individual destiny - our mission from on high. Proof ? We're happy !! We are answering the echo of that which Hashem created within us.

So when we want to know how we are doing spiritually - we must ask ourselves
- "Are we happy ?!"

Taking on G-d

When Moshe Rabbeinu comes to Pharoh for the first time the results are mildly disastrous. Pharoh increases the workload of the Jews to even more intolerable proportions. Then Moshe Rabbeinu does the unthinkable, especially for a prophet who has a clear understanding of Hashem.

He blames G-d.

This is the most righteous person in the generation - the one destined to receive the Torah from G-d's own hand ( so to speak ) and here he is .... blaming G-d ?!?! Why ?!?!

Because he loves us.

Hashem makes us a promise ( see tractate megilla 11a) that he will look out for us in every generation by sending us true leaders who will guide us through the winding, blinding pathways of Olam Hazeh into the wide pastures of Olam Habba. That these leaders are so dedicated to us, their charges, that they are willing even to do the unthinkable and challenge the Ribbono Shel Olam - that is the icing on the cake. A true expression of love from our shepherds who, in turn, represent to us the true love of Hashem.

I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

On Angels and Men

When we say "Kadosh Kadosh Kadosh ..." in kedusha we are actually echoing the angels. This is the high point of davening - it is there, at the pinnacle of our prayers, that we can really sing G-d's praises with the absolute clarity of a being that basks in His presence constantly. I mean, if these angels were created specifically to praise Hashem, you'd think that they do the best possible job of it! After all, they are tailor-made for the part.

So why introduce the kedusha with our own declaration? "Nekadesh ..." We will sanctify your name in this world ( "BaOlam" with a kamatz - as opposed to in the world " BeOlam" with a sheva na )

This is the difference between us and the malachim. They can sing the praises of G-d in ways we can barely hope to emulate - but their praise is static. The angels can only describe Hashem's majesty and holiness. We can extend it into this world through our actions. As creatures of free will and infinite choice, we can actually spread the mantle of G-d's glory willingly over ourselves and our world... by realizing that in our decisions, there is the opportunity to choose for ourselves or for G-d.

Go on, extend the majesty of Hashem to a corner of the world its never been before - next time you choose to do something right, keep in mind, you are doing it for G-d.

Is it black or white ?

Ever wonder why the sun might bleach hair but darken skin ? The answer may very well be found in Malachi 3:19-21.

Malachi, last of the prophets, culminates his prophecy with these apocryphal words -

"3:19 For, behold, the day cometh, that shall burn as an oven; and all the proud, yea, and all that do wickedly, shall be stubble: and the day that cometh shall burn them up, saith the Lord of hosts,t hat it shall leave them neither root nor branch.
3:20 But unto you that fear my name shall the sun of righteousness arise with healing in his wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall. "

The rishonim point out, however, that this is not a case of a great battle between the oven that burns the wicked and the sun that protects the righteous. Rather, they are one and the same ! The judgment you will receive at the end of days is your own just dessert, period. The sun, in this case, is just clarifying the consequences - that's why it can burn the wicked like an oven yet be pleasing to the righteous like a summer's day. May we merit to see the redeemer soon and may we feel the balmy rays of the sun and not it's vicious heat, amen.

Wow ! You're Jewish Too ?!?!

It isn't until Yosef fulfills two classic conditions for identifying a Jew out there in galus, that the brothers really accept him for who he is.

He eats gefilte fish and uses vague yiddishisms like chutzpah and kvell.

No, seriously, he speaks to them in their native tongue, lashon hakodesh, and he cries with them. A lot. Only after Yosef cries with Binyamin and cries upon his brothers, do they accept him.

We may be able to use these two benchmarks to define or redefine ourselves vis-a-vis the world at large. What is it that marks us as Jews ? Especially to our fellow Jews, our speech and our empathy.

Do we speak with the refinement and humility or is our speech littered with the boasts and brags of secular society, so alien to our values ? Have we finally absorbed "looking out for number 1" after being bombarded with it from so many media outlets ? These subtle, yet telling, indicators of our spiritual health are given to us to safeguard.
As a testament to Yosef HaTzaddik, who lived for 13 years in the Egyptian slave and penal system and 9 more in the still more morally corrupt palace, and did not succumb to their enticements - let us pledge to watch them and with them our spiritual development as a whole.

8 days, but why ?

A famous question asked in relation to Chanukah is : If the little jug had sufficient oil to last one day - wasn't the miraculous aspect of the lighting only seven days ? Shouldn't we then have a seven day holiday instead ?

The answers are many - That in simply finding the oil there was a miracle; that the extra day commemorates the military victory; that they only filled up an eighth of the oil cups in the Beis Hamikdash ( so the miracle was evident even on the first day ) - are among them.

I heard another answer that I believe merits to be shared. This was inspired by a very chashuve bochur in my neighborhood.

After years of battle and watching many comrades perish, the Maccabies would be, perhaps, justified in a certain cooling of their dedication to the cause - after seeing the heavy toll that it took. The miracle was not just the oil that was there to be lit - but also the fire ( double meaning intended ) to light it !

If we ever find ourselves triumphing in a struggle and then losing perspective once we've won - maybe we can find inspiration amongst our ancestors - that had the courage to see the fight through and stay the cause afterwards.

Happy Chanukah !

Must we be perfectionists ?

If there was oil in the Beis Hamikdash and the majority of the population was impure - then there is a halachic basis for permitting the Menorah to be lit with impure oil. What was gained, then, by trying to light in a better manner than was necessary ?

In order to understand, let us preempt.

Why did Hashem allow that jug of oil to escape defilement ? I maintain that it happened ( retroactively, perhaps ) because of the desire of the victorious Maccabies to serve Hashem in purity. If they had been willing to settle for impure oil, which would have been permissible, then Hashem would not have tweaked circumstances to save that little jug.

The concept of purity is perhaps the opposite of realism. Realism says "We'll do the best we can - and we'll deal with whatever shortfall there is". Purity says "It must be perfect. Period. Any other option is unacceptable." This dedication to purity is what enabled the Maccabies to serve Hashem in the unique manner ( militarily and spiritually ) in which they did.

It is also this dedication that ennobles our hearts at this time of year.

Are there aspects of our yiddishkeit that are just too impractical for our lifestyle ? Are there steps which are too difficult to take - for which there are legitimate other options ? Or are we chasing the lower standard, content with "acceptable," when the Maccabies, in our shoes would have fought for the ideal to the death ?

Is chasing dreams equivalent to burning bridges ?

Yosef tells his brothers of his impending royal position - and to his great detriment - he finds that they are none too happy with his pronouncement. Should he have kept it to himself ? What about the second dream - surely he could see that this vision was not welcomed by his brothers?! Why did he persist ?

But we must understand - not just the dream - but also the dreamer.

This is the same Yosef who, at six years old, stands in front of his mother to shield her from Esav. This is the Yosef who will be called tzaddik - Yosef the Just. If it is right to block the view of a wicked man from feasting his eyes upon a modest woman - then let it be done ! And if a six year old is the only one acutely aware of that need - he'll do it himself ! Perhaps an average person wouldn't advertise a conviction he had - especially if it would be contrary to popular opinion, or displeasing to others. A true paragon of Justice, however, wouldn't hesitate to state the truth - as it is - however and wherever it is found.
Yosef wasn't trying to hurt his brothers - or his relationship with them - by revealing that he would rule them as royalty in the future. Yosef was simply being himself.
As far as our own bridges - if and when our dreams conflict with them - if we find ourselves pursuing a life course that is inconsistent with the spiritual achievements that we dreamt about attaining - we must ask ourselves - can we not draw inspiration from Yosef ?

Say What ?!?

So Yaakov Avinu finally leaves Lavan after 20 years. After twenty years of exposure to his conniving father in law - Yaakov is justifiably proud of having resisted Lavan's influence - but his proclamation "With Lavan I lived and I kept 613 mitzvos" ( Rashi, Bereshis 32:5 ) - is aimed at ... Esav ?!

Why does Yaakov Avinu feel the need to share his spiritual statistics with his wicked, murderously intentioned brother ? Is Esav going to be his new mashgiach, that he feels the need to tell him of his nisyonos ?

Email me your answers - ydruyan at gmail dot com !

Yaakov was worried about his spiritual state. He was concerned that perhaps his divine protection would be rendered ineffectual due to a sin he may have committed - consequently he would not be worthy of that protection. In order to strengthen his resolve - Yaakov states, in clear, unequivocal terms - I am a taryag Jew - I keep all the mitzvos. In this way, by making the pronouncement public, Yaakov will force himself to live up to it. If he is worried that he may commit a sin - he will raise the bar on his accountability by making his declaration public.

What part of our public persona defines us religiously ? What does it say ?

R Druyan

The sound of silence

The Medrash ( Tanchuma Parashas Pekudei ) compares the various stages of a person's life and afterlife with the four significant events that surrounded the ascension of Eliyahu HaNavi to heaven. The final, and perhaps, most awe inspiring of the four is the silence. It is compared to the final judgment before the throne of glory.

Probably the most powerful attribute of silence is its inevitability. No matter how much noise you make or how many distractions you set up - it's always out there, waiting for your noise to give out or your distraction to finish. It seems as if silence is the inevitable force in the universe - it's the default -to counter it you need to add, to do.

That's probably why the medrash compares it to the final judgment - it's coming, no matter what. And just like silence - it only scares us if we have something to be afraid of. A righteous person - finds comfort and serenity in silence, a wicked one - accusations and guilt.

What do you find ?

Still Here !!! Are you ?

Sorry about the ultra-long hiatus - I was unavoidably detained by planning, then executing a trip to the States. But, I'm back !

We find that Rivka Imainu is referred to as the daughter of Besuel and the sister of Lavan - why is she associated with such wicked people ? To teach us ( says Rashi ) that she was righteous despite being tainted with their influence... thus teaching us that a solitary person of good in a sea of evil is more praiseworthy than one who is surrounded by goodness.

So why does the Torah imply the exact opposite ?

When giving klal yisrael promises of good, Hashem tells the Jews - [if you will keep the mitzvos] "then five of you will defeat a hundred attackers, and a hundred will repel an attack by ten thousand." (Vayikra 26:8) When pointing out that the ratio is off ( 5:100 is less than 100:10,000 ) , Rashi says that those who keep the Torah in greater numbers are more praiseworthy - thus the greater (divinely inspired) abilities.

So what's better - Rivka who overcame her surroundings, or Hashem's promise which seems to favor mass observance over solitary triumph ?

Email me your answers ! ydruyan at gmail dot com

On burnings and slaughterings

In the Yom Kippur davening, we keep mentioning the zechus of the akeida. We petition Hashem to remember the mesirus nefesh displayed during this monumental trial - and in its merit grant us a chance at life and serving Him better etc. etc. But why is the akeida known as Avraham's nisayon ? And what pivotal role does it play in our convictions to become better Jews ?

When we ponder the meaning of such phrases as 'the ultimate sacrifice', we can't help but assume that there is nothing more heroic than giving up our life for something. Yet, there does seem to be an action that is even more fundamental in it's devotion than dying for something.

It's living for it.

While deciding to die for a cause or an ideal is a tough decision - it's a decision that you can make only once. Living for something - that's a decision that gets replayed over and over and over and over. It takes much more conviction and strength of character to live for something, reaffirming that initial decision a million times over. So, while for Yitzchak Avinu, the willing participation in the akeida was a show of dedication, for Avraham Avinu it was a show of mesirus nefesh a hundred times greater. That's why we ask Hashem to recall the great zechus of the akeida. It represents a truly awesome level of dedication to Hashem. It is also the reason that we seek to employ this merit in our process of teshuva - because Hashem doesn't want us to perish in retribution for our sins ( even if this would cleanse us of them ! ). Rather, Hashem would prefer that we repent from our wayward actions and live. A life of service to Hashem - a life that reaffirms and reenforces that intitial decision to return to Him every moment of every day thereafter.

Secondly, in the prayers there is a strong current of yearning for the return of the avodas beis hamikdash. What about the animal sacrifices that were brought are we trying to recall fondly ? The blood ? The guts ? If our perspective of the holy korbanos is limited to the animals which took part - we are sorely shortsighted. True, animals were slaughtered in a ritual fashion and parts were sprinkled on the mizbeach.

The most fundamental part, however, was the fire that consumed them.

If we look at the pesukim that describe the avodah the most striking refrences are to the consuming fire. We know that the avodah in the Beis Hamikdash was replaced by our davening, but did we realize that the core of the process is still the same ?! Just like a fire - once it gets going will continue to grow and roar of its own volition - so too our prayers just need one little injection of sincere enthusiasm and 'fire' from us - and then Hashem will grant us the divine assistance neccesary for a meaningful davening.

Our tefillos have the power of the Aish Tamid, the power of the ever burning flame that graced G-od's own temple!

May it be His will that all of klal yisrael's tefilos be accepted by the Merciful One Above on this our day of greatest closeness to Him, and that we should merit to be sealed in the books of goodness, repentenance and sincere service of Him, always. Amen.

Go(d) team !!

"We won ! We won !!" Those shouts could be heard echoing all through downtown, especially the bar district. The hometown team had just won the championship and there was a general ecstasy surrounding the entire city. Everyone felt a part of it. They were proud of their team - they were proud of themselves.

"What a load of simpletons !", The cynic sneered contemptuously.
"They are walking around lording their victory over 'lesser mortals' - they didn't even do anything ! Did that lady over there score the winning point ? No. Did that fat man make the defensive play that saved the victory ? Hardly. They are just fooling themselves into believing they had a part in it and relieving the tedium of their lives with sports as their chosen opiate."

"Not so", said the wise man, "While the fans were not on the field - it was their encouragement, if not devotion, that gave the players the impetus to succeed. Any player will tell you he does better with a hundred thousand fans cheering him on than in training. Have you ever heard of any records being broken on the practice field ? Their effort is linked to the fans."

Kal vachomer when we speak of cheering on - or supporting - or coronating Hakadosh Baruch Hu.

A cynic would claim that G-d's kingdom lacks nothing that a mere mortal can give Him. Yet, on Rosh HaShanna we do just that - pledge to Hashem the one thing He doesn't already have - our hearts.

On this holy day - we proclaim to Hashem - "Not only are you the G-d - you are also my G-d - and I am your loyal servant."

Kesiva Vechasima Tova L'Kol Am Yisrael !

R' Druyan

Reason is the spice of life

While learning the halachos of a meat and milk mixture ( forbidden !! ) I came across an inspirational idea. The sefer I was learning from introduced an explanation of the reasoning for a particular ruling by the Rashba ( Rabbi Shlomo Ben Aderet - a fourteenth century scholar ) - with the words "Taam haRashba" ( Lit. the Rashba's reasoning ). Since we were dealing with the absorbed flavors of the milk into the meat and vice versa - we thought the pun was wonderful !

Then another idea became apparent - the reason that "reason" and "flavor" are the same word (Taam) is because they really do fulfill the same function. If you want your food to be more interesting ( not more nutritious ) you flavor it - and if you want your religion to mean more to you - look for the reason behind the practices you keep.

Happy Spicing !!

'till next time,
R' Druyan

Be Happy .......... Worry !

Rabbeinu Yonah in his classic work, Shaarei Teshuva, quotes a statement of the sages - "Man is destined to work - joyous is one whose work is in Torah."

The sentiment expressed is as follows : Life is all about work. Effort, toil, perseverance. Mankind must DO something. One who is fortunate, however, will make his portion of toil in the sweet fields of Torah.

In another mashal - chazal say - the one who toils in mundane matters is considered like a tanner, whose person stinks from the chemicals used on the hides. In contrast, a person whose toil is in Torah is like a perfume salesman whose person is pleasing to the nose...

So we see that we're doomed to work. But we get to choose what our work is.

In this life, we are going to worry about something. We are going to strive and make efforts and try to succeed. At some points these thoughts and drives might even define who we are.

Wouldn't it be better if what I worry about, what consumes me is a desire to perfect my tefilah - or my ability to truly empathize with the recipient of my gemillus chasadim - instead of how much money I will make or how good I will look in this outfit ?

To live a better life, work for something that makes you smell good. And play your 'worry' cards on serving God.

'till next time,

R' Druyan

Is Tzaraas Only Skin Deep ?

The torah says "Guard yourself from the affliction of tzaraas..." and then juxtaposes ( fancy term for putting next to each other ) "Remember what Hashem did to Miriam..."

The simple meaning - Miriam got tzaraas - make sure you don't get it too !
However, Rashi tells us that 'guarding yourself from tzaraas' means making sure not to accidentally peel off any skin sore which may be tzaraas ( eeeeeewwww ). Doesn't sound like much of an accident to me -

'hmm I wonder what this is ? Oh ! Uh, uh, I guess I'll just flick it off and no one will know'

Yet, when we think we can offer a superficial answer to tzaraas - like just flicking it off - comes the Torah to remind us that we can't.
You see, Miriam got tzaraas because she spoke ill of Moshe Rabbeinu ( She said he was acting a little too remote - even for a prophet). But, she really didn't mean to - she thought what she was saying was true - she didn't investigate further to realize that her prophecy and her brother Moshe's prophecy were totally different. Her actions weren't just wrong they were superficial.

Let's remember that every time we feel like someone did something wrong and it would be a 'mitzva' to publicize and not let them 'get away with it'. Are we thinking or acting superficially ? Could there be another side to the story ?

- till next time,

R' Druyan

Yetzer Hara Trick # 72

So at the beginning of shemonei esrei or bentching we go into it with a lot of kavanna - right ?

"Gosh at that pace - I'll never finish! I'll be here all year !"

So then you speed it up a little ....

"Wow, davening / bentching is just flying by ..... Wait! We're up to that part already ?!?!?!"

"If I slow down now I'll be such a hypocrite - slowing down just to show that I don't bentch / daven too fast ... I'll just finish up at this pace - but next time, next time - I'll really have kavanna !"

( go to top of post ....... )

'till next time,

R' Druyan

You Be Good Now, Ya' Hear ?!?!?

We say it in Shema every day. 'If you will surely listen and hearken to Hashem's Mitzvos .....'. We won't even touch the concept of reward and punishment. Yet. However, why must Hashem refer to listening to the mitzvos with a repetitive, doubled phrase ?

Because sometimes we hear but don't listen, or even worse - listen but don't hearken ( to hear and take as a call-to-action ).

In trying to sift through our daily lives and trying to hear the call to do Hashem's work - we should listen for it. And if we don't hear it - we should listen again.

Just like a servant will not just listen to his master when he is commanded to do something, he will also wait, listening for any new commands the master might have.

We should also be constantly 'listening' - waiting to discern more opportunities for serving Hashem.

Be'Hatzlacha !
R' Druyan

Just a little bit of Yiraah

So Moshe tells us - "And now - what does Hashem your G-d ask of you ? Just that you should be in awe of Him ....." [Devarim 10:12]
The Talmud already asks [Brachos 33b, Megilla 25a] "Why 'Just' - is Yiraas Hashem such a small thing ?'
The answers range from yes to no to maybe ( See the Gemara / Ramban / Kli Yakar / Or HaChaim Hakadosh ad loc. ) but one approach which we can effectively use to keep our own spiritual 'charge' is put forth by the Or HaChaim Hakadosh.

You can have a 'little bit' of Yiraah.

There are some things that can't be done by halves. You can't be a little bit shomer shabbos ( I avoid 26 of the melachos ! ) and you can't be a little bit pregnant ( uhh - yeah ). You can, however, have a little bit of Yiraah. Not all-out fear and awe at Hashem's magnificence. Not an overpowering trembling because of His awesomeness. But a bit. Yes, we feel that Hashem is there and that is a reason for increased observance / seriousness / trepidation. Not a lot - but an actual perceptible 'little bit'. And that's good.

So, even if we see ourselves as never reaching the great levels of the Tzaddikim who would be overcome with Yiraas Hashem they would shake and tremble for hours, we can still achieve our own 'little bit'.

Hatzlacha !