Ruling : A How To Guide

The Torah describes the episode of Yehuda and Tamar as an interlude between the selling of Yosef and the events that would bring about his ultimate redemption from slavery.

Rashi, quoting the Medrash, teaches us that Yehuda was effectively exiled for failing to suggest that Yosef should be returned to their father unharmed. It was during this exile that the events with his sons and Tamar transpired. Following this incident, we can see that Yehuda is once again accepted into his brothers' midst. He even rises back to his position of leadership – as we see when he is appointed responsible for Binyamin in the second Egypt expedition (to barter for grain during the famine).

What did Yehuda learn – or what atonement did he perform – through his misadventures with Tamar ?

When Tamar seduces Yehuda, she takes from him three items as collateral – against his promise of payment. His staff, signet ring and cloak. Taken at face value, these are items of both practical and personal value to Yehuda and he would be sure to redeem them with his promised payment. On a deeper level, points out the Kli Yakar, these are highly symbolic items – and the key to Yehuda's personal redemption and rehabilitation.

The signet ring represents the bris that Hashem has signed into Yehuda's flesh (and every Jewish male since). Hashem is telling Yehuda – through Tamar – that if you will follow your desires you will be giving up or reneging on your covenant with Him. The staff is the scepter of kingship. Certainly, a king cannot be subject to his whims – how can he rule others when he can't even rule himself. Finally, Yehuda is persuaded to give up his cloak – the tzitzis – the symbol of the mantle of mitzvos that we willingly accept upon ourselves. You cannot dedicate your actions to God and to your desires.

When Yehuda charges Tamar with infidelity she merely hands over the items and requests that he realize what he is about to do. Yehuda then has a choice – to remain seemingly oblivious to Tamar's plight and his own level of involvement, or to acknowledge his responsibility for the actions that he committed. With heroic determination, Yehuda rises to the challenge – effectively reclaiming his charge over himself, his actions and - later - his brothers, as well.

Certainly we can all be inspired by Yehuda's personal redemption to assume a more active charge of whichever aspect in our lives may need a firmer grip and surer hand.

Hatzlacha !!